Chef and I hit Happy E, for a night out on the town. Happy E was full of people and the energy was pretty nice. We sat at the bar, and chilled with our friend George while we drank.

At the time, I was more prone to approach every cute girl within eyeshot while Chef would be more reserved and let the girls flock to him. Supposedly in some book this strategy is called “The Mysterio”.

Anyway as I was turned to look at the flat screens behind the bar, Chef pulled “The Mysterio” and two girls came over and started talking to him. From what I remember, Chef was laughing at how poorly one of them danced.

Girl: What are you laughing at?

Chef: You

Girl: Why are you laughing at me?

Chef: Don’t worry about it

By the time I turned around, the girls were talking to us. We found out that one of the girls was a dancer while there other one was not. We talked to them for a while then asked what they were doing later. The two girls invited us to hang out with them at Jerry’s diner afterward and Chef got one of their numbers.

Somewhat stoked, we chilled for a bit, closed our tabs, and headed for Jerry’s Diner. The only problem was…we had NO idea where Jerry’s was. I asked one of the bartenders how to get there. He gave me directions that were on par with what the girls had said before they left.

Chef and I hopped into the car and drove west. We kept driving until we realized that it has been a while and we have not seen Jerry’s. We soon realized we were way off when we hit Beverly Hills. How we hit Beverly Hills and did not previously notice a drastic change in scenery was beyond me (and still is to this day)

At some point Chef called the number the girl gave him, but the call went straight to voice mail. Chef looked at the phone shocked that the number could possible be fake. Never in our lives had either of us received a fake number. Though he admitted the girl was pretty drunk as well. To this day we’re not sure if it was a fake number.

We kept driving determined to find this place. I stopped my car in the middle of Beverly Hills and whipped out my smart phone. I started looking up Jerry’s or Gerry’s or Jerri’s or Gerri’s, anything I could think of. I called a few locations and none of them had any idea what I was talking about. Screw it.

Now more determined than ever to find this place, we continued driving. For some reason Chef was sure we’d find it on out current path and I was too stubborn to turn around. We kept driving west

We eventually realized that we fucked up when we hit the beach…Santa Monica Beach. We went so far that we actually hit the  ocean….from HOLLYWOOD. I stopped the car and Chef got out to pee on the beach. He hopped back in the car and we weighed our options. In what appeared to be drunken defiance, we pressed on.

We were not about to go home because we were too determined to find the girls and scold them for giving us a crappy phone number. We decided to hop on the freeway and find a Jerry’s taking another route with the original directions we were given.

Long story short, we wound up in West Hollywood…probably one of the last places we expected to be that night. I soon realized I was by my frat bother’s house so I tried waking him up. Mind you, it’s about 3am at this point.

I gave up rather quickly and went back to car. Beaten, Chef and I went back to Taco Bell. We spent an hour or more driving in the wrong direction. In the end we went home.

A week or so later as we were driving through Hollywood, we drove past Jerry’s, it was really close to Happy Ending. How the hell did we miss it? How did we drive so far from Hollywood that we hit the beach? Why didn’t we turn around? What were those girls’ names? Were they even hot enough to chase that far? How did our night end in West Hollywood when we were chasing women? There are so many questions from that night and too few answers…

~P-Tyme